My husband and i have been married for 14 yrs, initially we had a wonderful relationship, things started going sour after we lost our first child, he died a few days after birth. It was a very difficult period for both of us but a few months later we began to try for another child as soon as i got pregnant again my husband changed, he started keeping late nights, coming and going when he pleases when i ask questions he hits me it got to a point where he hit me for anything and everything i even got hospitalized as a result of his beating. when i told his mother about the physical and verbal abuse she said i should avoid provoking him as her son has always had a short temper, i wonder why i never noticed the temper in the years we dated.
Things improved a bit after the birth of our daughter he showered her with attention and began to come home more. After the birth of our fourth child the doctor advised us to not try again for another baby, i wasn’t ready to anyway because at this point i was tired of his inconsistent behavior since he got angry at the slightest, instead i
focused my attention on raising our kids Sometime last year, my husband fell seriously ill test results showed that he is HIV positive, apparently he had known for a while but didn’t tell me probably because he wanted to get me infected too. I stayed in the hospital with him throughout the period until he got back on his feet. Now he is fine although he is on his daily drugs i am wondering if i should leave him but i have never worked and skipped youth service because he asked me to as he did not want to be with
the kids, i cannot afford to take care of the kids on my own, what should I do?
Please I need your candid advice!
18 comments:
Leave ke? Pick RACE
He is abusive and has HIV???My sister what other eye opener do u need to leave???is it wen ure 6feet below??Pls LEAVE
Pls let her leave the house
what are you still waiting for....If your negative pls leave don't wait to waste your life
I pity you my dear you can wait if you love him as for me I'm moving out of his house
I think you should run as fast as u can o! U be mumu? That man can kill u,if he could keep such a thing as his hiv status from u,I wonder what else he is capable of!
Babe better park that man well...I pity you ooooooo
I wil start by sayn dt d fact dt al humans r unstable scares me. U marry a lovn man 2dy n 2mao he's a monster! Wt do u do?run? Isn't dt d easy way out? Sudnt u stay n work it out or in dis case cos of ur kids? Isn't dt wt society requires 4rm us women?... Havin said dis, I tink dis woman's situatn is different givn dt d man z Hiv positve. How did he contact d disease? He may hv bin sleepn around... And y com he dint mentn it 2 d woman @ d initial tym? Na wao... On top of his health issue, him stil de panel beat d wife. Abeg d woman sud leave dt marriage kia kia. Of course its nevr gona b easy. Bt I think its a personal decision on d woman's part weda 2 stay or get out of d marriage. Plus if it was d woman dts hiv positve n kept quiet abt it, d man wud raise hell n stil leave her. So u c d man fuck up wella. D woman sud understnd dt dis is a matr of life n daeth o! N d sad fact of life is dt nobdy is indispensible. If she dies as a result of d man's cruelty or gt infected wit hiv,d marriage nevr finish? Abeg who wil now take kia of who?. And 4 petez sake, her children wil survive wit or witout dia illicit father!
An abusive man will remain so regardless of d situation. If twas just d illness, I would hv adviced her to stay n help him out,cos he could hv contacted it through another means. But d abusive part is wat is intollerable n unacceptable. Couples must quarell with things said n heard, but physically abusing ur spouse to d extent of her been hospitalised is completely unmanly n shld be overcomed by just one act. FLEE my sister cos ur kids need u more than u need d marraige.We r supposed to enjoy n not endure in a marraige.Life is too short to take such physical battering especially from he whom u love.
Na wah o, wonders shall never end! Hmmmmmm
Wat I wuld advice is dat if d man stil gets physical even in his condition, pls leave cos u hav ur kids 2 luk after, bt if he has changed I feel it wuld b gud 2 tk cr of him if u stil luv him, bt on d whole put ur kids n urself 1st in wateva decision u com 2 n do ask God 4 guidance.
I dnt tink I want 2 av anytin 2 do wit such person after all dat he has done,becos any guy dat is capable of des act can kill me one day!
Its difficult but u can stay if u love him and feel u can live wit it.but as 4 me,i dont think i can stay cos ill b living in fear.wat if d man just av sex wit u forcefully oneday?wat will b ur fate n n ur children's fate if dat happens?
You have been through a lot, it feels you have endured these ordeals over the years because of your love for your children and I applaud you for that. You are a woman of substance, despite all the abuse and violence you suffered, still you found the courage to look after him when he was sick at the hospital. You do have a choice, my advice is to let his family and yours know about what he has done to you over the years, surely there should be a member of the family who will be ready to help until you can find a suitable job to support yourself and your children.
Very impress.......LWTZE for this awareness, also the website. Keep up the good work.
Simi Hassan Xx
I think u shld stick 2 him! How come u didn't think about dumping him wen u had issue? Till u found out of his status?
Best option is 4 u 2 leave,one night he suddenly changed,now HIV postive,wishing 2 infect with. The disease must u wait b4 he sells part ur body 2 meat seller well. Is ur choice if u like die there tiLl u die b4 ur tyme, heard he loves Boxing again,is it untill he turns u. Into bunching bags dart u will know dat ur service is no longer required. Comcerning the kids, 4 me I will love to use dis yoruba Adage that says is Only God that cater 4 the orghange. Children d people in charge are only puting dere best into it nii......so. From this run 4. Ur dear life with ur children else they will suffer!!!!
Just shuttup yur dirty mouth! Stick with him indeed.
Run for ur life with ur childern,such men re very deadly he can harm u,abv all b very close tu God cos he has saved u.n he his able tu supply all needs accordin his riches in glory.just beliv n sef urself by
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